This Christian girl I used to work with got knocked up by her god fearing husband after an intercourse session, and then started buying every book in sight that dealt with the issue of pregnancy. One in particular spoke of food cravings that pregnant women experience. It said that some of the cravings could be out of the ordinary and if you were to experience any of them, to consult a doctor. It meant you were missing something in your diet. The foods they spoke of;
1) Laundry Detergent
2) Dirt
Ahem, okay, so, maybe I guess. I once wanted a steak and kraft dinner sandwich, but I am not pregnant.
The dirt thing has stuck with me though. I actually even think about it when I stroll by a garden. I picture a bunch of ladies 'with child' down on all fours and swiveling soil into their mouths. It's one of many things that come into my mind during a day and make me laugh out loud.
Again, I have formulated a short list of things that are out of the ordinary that make me laugh.
Shall we?

1) A co-worker who is particularly lousy, unloads her ass between unloading boxes at work. I seem to always stumble into the washroom after her. Guaranteed, there are shit streaks tracing the path of her turd down the drain, and the very recognizable smell of stewed tomatoes. It always smells like stewed tomatoes. At the time it's awful and I consider giving up the fruit that so many mistake for a vegetable. But, the wounds heal fast, and I laugh in the pantry, and the canned food isle!

2) Pubic hair stuck to the soap bar. It used to really chap my ass, but I've embraced it. It's funny to me how people refuse to use washcloths, and just jam the poor ivory (99.44) into their crack and dark spots, and then don't even wash the evidence away. Ok wait, that ones not so funny. USE YOUR FUCKING HANDS. (need some more counseling on that one.)

3) Paris Hilton and Le Tigre working on an album together. What else can I do but laugh. First it was the cell phones, now it's Paris Hilton.

4) Puberty, lately I have found the whole process of moving into adulthood to be quite a laugh. I mean, I work in a trashy part of Ontario, pretty low income, so, a lot of the patrons at my store look as if they've styled their hair with a piece of buttered toast. They're children look even worse. There was one girl who came in with her mom (a biker/spinner) and she was maybe 11 years old. She had little acorn boobies, I call them that because when I was a kid I used to shove acorns up my shirt and amaze my friends with ho much they looked like the developing breasts of the girls in our classes. Anyway, she was wearing one of those shirts that are tight on your boobie region, and then flare out all over right below your ta tas. They'd make even Karen Carpenter look chunky. That's beside the point. This girl was walking around with her chest out and kept pulling at the shirt to ensure the tight spot stayed over her barely visible mams. I saw a young boy walk by and she actually hiked her shoulders back and stuck out what she had. He noticed too, and they both smiled. I was ecstatic when I got my first pube, so it's not too odd for me to see proud kids. But, it is damn funny. Looking back on it, I was fugly, wore bad clothes and got geeked about the first hair that sprouted near my dink. I was a big dork. These kids are big dorks. But they are so completely clueless to their lack of cool, that I laugh heartily at their expense. Try it sometime, kids who hit puberty go insane for a few years. Good times.